Both sides in a marriage are called to be selfless. It is a lifelong commitment and not to be taken lightly. It requires work and sacrifice, love and grace on both sides. And a walk with Jesus by both partners to make it the fullest it can be.
Paul is not being a sexist, but a realist. God calls us to roles within His church and within a marriage. And those He gives authority to He holds accountable.
Thanks Andy, I felt like I needed to follow-up the post from yesterday.
Max_Justin
· 11 months ago
Thank you for adding this segment to yesterday's post.
When I proposed to my wife [of 15 years now], I researched what the bible taught, and it took me to Paul's letter to the church in Ephesus. That I am to love my wife as I love myself, but then I was struck that it no where said for wives to love the husband, only to honor and respect him. I took this to mean that the burden is on me as the husband.
I had never been taught this in a church, and it is very rarely discussed in the churches that I have been a part of over the years.
As you said, this is not an easy task. I am selfish, and self centered - wanting things my way. It is not easy to live Paul's words, our human nature wants to rebel against it. But that is the whole Christian walk!
zpr
· 11 months ago
This is a timely topic Shane as I have been thinking about this sort of subject recently. I have only been married a little over a year but am finding the challenges are making me become a better person. One of the subjects no one brings up when talking about those who waited in life to get married is how much more difficult it is to adjust one’s lifestyle. I am learning that teaching an old dog a new trick is possible.
Shane Vander Hart
· 11 months ago
@MaxJ - I do think the burden is on us - that is leadership. I also think that it is hard for a wife to do anything but love her husband when he puts her before himself.
@zpr - God bless you in your relatively new marriage!
Societyvs
· 11 months ago
I agree with your sentiments here Shane - all the way. Marriage is about putting self in the hands of the other - being the support of the other - being one and not divided. I think that's why I can say 'I don't like divorce' because I have seen some that happen for all the wrong reasons - or people don't put much stock into keeping the marriage 'alive' (I was a prime example of this).
But I learned that getting it right means getting a lot more good out of life than settling for hurt, pain, seperation, or giving up. I value marriage a lot (personal choice) and I want to give my best to my wife - not my second best or sometimes - nothing at all. Marriage is sacred to me - there is something very great in it when it works well. I have seen enough of those glimpses to know its the path I desire to take - and I want to be the best husband I can be.
Great Post Shane! I agree with you about Grace permeating.
The idea of sacrifice is so central to anything that is worthy or Holy. Marriage Ceremonies usually are ones of celebration as well they should be. The marrige ceremony is much more sweet and meaningful if the idea of death to self and sacrifice is brought in.
HiScrivener
· 11 months ago
So, Pastor? When are you taking your pre-martial counseling booty kicking tour on the road? When you do, I'll buy the first ticket!
Whew! That was a good read, brother.
It's a shame more rednecks can't... I mean, won't read this one.
All Comments
Paul is not being a sexist, but a realist. God calls us to roles within His church and within a marriage. And those He gives authority to He holds accountable.
Nice, thoughtful post you have here.
<abbr>AndyCs last blog post..The Old Grey Mare</abbr>
When I proposed to my wife [of 15 years now], I researched what the bible taught, and it took me to Paul's letter to the church in Ephesus. That I am to love my wife as I love myself, but then I was struck that it no where said for wives to love the husband, only to honor and respect him. I took this to mean that the burden is on me as the husband.
I had never been taught this in a church, and it is very rarely discussed in the churches that I have been a part of over the years.
As you said, this is not an easy task. I am selfish, and self centered - wanting things my way. It is not easy to live Paul's words, our human nature wants to rebel against it. But that is the whole Christian walk!
@zpr - God bless you in your relatively new marriage!
But I learned that getting it right means getting a lot more good out of life than settling for hurt, pain, seperation, or giving up. I value marriage a lot (personal choice) and I want to give my best to my wife - not my second best or sometimes - nothing at all. Marriage is sacred to me - there is something very great in it when it works well. I have seen enough of those glimpses to know its the path I desire to take - and I want to be the best husband I can be.
<abbr>Societyvss last blog post..Religulous, Ridiculous, and Righteous</abbr>
The idea of sacrifice is so central to anything that is worthy or Holy. Marriage Ceremonies usually are ones of celebration as well they should be. The marrige ceremony is much more sweet and meaningful if the idea of death to self and sacrifice is brought in.
Whew! That was a good read, brother.
It's a shame more rednecks can't... I mean, won't read this one.
Peace,
HiScrivener
<abbr>HiScriveners last blog post..Church is finding a “home on the range”</abbr>